QUESTION:

Dear Maria,

I just wanted to know what I should do now that me and my guy have been dating for 8 months…3 months exclusively and I’m still finding inappropriate conversations with other guys in his phone. Should I talk about it and move on or should I leave?

I’m so confused because I really like him and do enjoy what we have.

- Miss Conduct

ANSWER:

First of all, this name is ovaaahh!

This situation seems to be a running trend in this millennial dating world. Believe me. You are not alone!

I think the answer is super simple. Whether you choose to leave or stay and work it out, you’re in the right! Dating rules are really discretionary to each individual relationship. The fact here is that you guys have only been exclusive for 3 months. I’m not making excuses, but it may take some people a little more time to adjust. However, I wouldn’t blame you if you’re pissed or disappointed because the moment you discuss being exclusive you would assume that the terms are clear. The mistake here is that it’s wrong to assume. 

You should address the situation while creating parameters or rules to what exclusive dating means to you both. That way, you can hold each other accountable in situations like this. I think you should have that talk ASAP and just go with the flow. Let him show you he can respect you and your values while dating and make it real clear that you won’t tolerate that shit again! 

Set the tone. Good Luck Hunny!

-Maria 

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